Posthumous Love :(

Lost my confidence in you, i am still yearning, 

getting over the aftermath, i am still learning, 

Places we used to be together , still hold good in dreams, 

broken i am as you are, still searching my real self in ruins. 

My love for you never turned lame, 

even though you din realize it was forever the same, 

My pursuit for happiness is still in endeavor, 

getting over you or back to you is still in your favor, 

My insomniac eyes says it all, 

i still find you busy and having a ball, 

Though i need you, but, will never express, 

over the time i 'll find ways for my feelings to suppress.

My Love

I keep on sobbing, my pillow becomes wet,

I keep on wandering, my thoughts become wild,

I keep on panicking my, hands become shivery,

I keep on dreading, my past comes aghast,

I keep on looking at her, my eyes become wet,

I keep on thinking, my fantasies become true,

I keep on thinking, my bed becomes my lover,

I ME MYSELF

I FEEL LOW,I FEEL HURT,BUT, I DONT CRY,,
I FIGHT BACK MY TEARS, I FIGHT BACK THE PAIN ,BUT, I DONT BREAK DOWN,,
I SHOW ATTITUDE, I MISBEHAVE, BUT, I AM NOT A BAD PERSON,,
I BREAK HEARTS,I BREAK FRIENDSHIPS ,BUT, I AM NOT A BAD PERSON,,
I FUSS AROUND, I DONT GET ALONG, BUT, I AM NOT A DUMB ASS

sometimes.......

Sometimes i sit besides the tree in my backyard, where i generally used to, and think 

"Have i really become what i wanted to?????"

Did i really work hard for what i wanted to become or it was people's sarcasm that i failed not after trying but failing to try.....

Sometimes i think

"is she the 1 i really loved?????"

Did i really find a girl worth dying for?

Or it was just a level of uncertainty i was going through and grabbed a wrong 1.....

Sometimes i imagine

"Do i really convey the same message to people what i wanted to?????"

Did i really talk to someone the way i should or rather the way i actually wanted to?

Or it was just a flurry of feelings which preoccupied my mind.....

Sometimes i really think what would i had been if i had not been the way i am. today....

I WISH IT STAYED :(

EVERY MORNING I SEE A HOPE IN ME BUT IT JUST VANISHES;

I WISH IT STAYED.

EVERY MORNING I ENDEAVOR FOR SOMETHING IT JUST LEAVES ME;

I WISH IT STAYED.

EVERY MORNING I ROAM AROUND IN PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS IT JUST PASSES;

I WISH IT STAYED.

EVERY NIGHT I SEE A DREAM IT JUST  FADES AWAY;

I WISH IT STAYED.

EVERY TIME I FEEL SOMEONE CLOSE TO ME IT JUST GOES AWAY;

I WISH IT STAYED.

EVERY TIME I SLEEP IN BED TO DIE IT JUST WAKES ME UP;

I WISH IT STAYED.

LIFE

INTO THE DARK NIGHT AS I CRAWL;
          ENGAGED WITH THE FEELINGS I BRAWL;
GOING BACK INTO THE DAYS WHEN I WAS A LAD;
         MY LIFE WAS JOYOUS AND NEVER FILLED WITH SAD;
AS THOSE DAYS ARE GONE AND WILL COME BACK NEVER;
        BUT MEMORIES OF THAT TIME WILL REMAIN FOREVER AND EVER;
THE MORE AND MORE I BRING THOSE MEMORIES BACK;
       THE MORE AND MORE I REALIZE THE THINGS I LACK;
SO NEVER MISS THE MEMORIES, NEVER REGRET;
       COZ WE ARE JUST LIVING IT TODAY WHERE IT HAS ALREADY BEEN SET.